The Erotic Writer

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川柳 • afterward

川柳 • afterward
an erotic senryu by Redbud

·
·

apricot
brandy — and still, on my lips, my lover’s
·················orgasm

5 comments on “川柳 • afterward

  1. paul1510
    February 17, 2013

    Will,
    interesting, it seems to me that these poets demand that one uses ones imagination, and becomes fully immersed in the poets thoughts.
    In short they are making me work for my pleasure.
    Paul.

    • willcrimson
      February 17, 2013

      Yes, exactly. If you can enjoy them at this level, then their very minimalism allows them to be incredibly expansive and rich. A single haiku can have hundreds of pages of commentary by different poets and readers over many centuries, all finding in the poem some facet or possibility that hasn’t been considered. The haiku is really a miracle. There’s nothing else like it in any other tradition, though the great Western scholar R.H. Blyth often found haiku-like passages in Western poetry.

      One element of haiku that all the best have in common is the bringing together of disparate observations into a moment of unity, insight and epiphany. In the best haiku, there is always that ‘Ah ha!’ moment when we see the seprate become one or the unitary becomes the universal. We see how things we might not have linked together suddenly seem inseparable. The Senryu doesn’t always share this facet of haiku, being more humorous, but the best do, in my opinion.

      Here’s a near-perfect erotic senryu that I think you will like, Paul, by a Western haiku master named Lee Gurga:

      old lovers–
      only her left nipple
      becomes erect

    • paul1510
      February 17, 2013

      Will,
      I love how enthusiastic you become, you are much more real immersed as you are.
      The Japaneses are a very interesting people, if only people could forget the past.
      Paul.

  2. vanillamom
    February 17, 2013

    I love the myriad of images that flood me as I read, re-read, pause, read again. I see the wine, sitting forgotten on the edge of the nightstand, the half-smile as the taste is recalled, the slant of the light, even.

    The sun sets, illuminating the brandy, a splash of copper light shining on the wall, an orgasm of light and reflection.

    You make magic happen here.

    nilla

  3. Harper Eliot
    February 19, 2013

    Your writing makes my soul ache. It’s really something else…

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The Obsidian Lens and Crimsonian contain links to password-protected stories from the Erotic Writers with darker themes. For more information on Obsidian Lens, click here. Email William Crimson directly for admission to the Crimsonian.

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